Treat your bottoms like princesses. 10 things you must do to become a better top.

Bottoms are the most precious gift given to the gay community, offering their beautiful bums to be used and filled. There are many articles advising on how to be a better bottom. But all that effort shouldn’t be one sided – topping involves a lot less preparation, but that means a good top should do […]

Love + Sex Sex Education Kevin Moroso

This article was published on April 8th, 2015

10 things you must do to become a better top. Bottoms are the most precious gift given to the gay community, offering their beautiful bums to be used and filled. There are many articles advising on how to be a better bottom. But all that effort shouldn’t be one sided – topping involves a lot less preparation, but that means a good top should do what he can to ensure the bottom’s pleasure. Here are 10 things you must do to become a better top.

  1. Lube. It’s your responsibility to supply the lube. Silicone is more viscous and dries out less quickly but it is harder to clean up than water-based lube. You can buy little packets to carry around with you in case of unexpected encounters.
  2. Boner pills. If you’ve ever had trouble staying hard enough before or during anal sex, which generally requires you to be stiffer than for vaginal sex, you probably have felt embarrassed. Get a prescription for some boner pills such as Viagra or Cialis. Viagra works out to be about $5 a dose. There’s no harm in carrying an extra one in your pocket when you go out on a Saturday night; who knows where you’ll end up.
  3. Breathe freshener. There is no bigger turn off than having someone with bad breathe on top of you. Carry some breathe freshener around with you should you have a spontaneous moment.
  4. The safer sex chat. Talk about prophylaxis before you start anything, preferably before you meet up. It is not right to get a guy’s ass hungry for cock during foreplay and then tell him you don’t use condoms. These decisions should be made when both people are thinking rationally and clearly.
  5. Tongue that boy. Nothing gets a guy’s ass hungrier for cock than some good old fashioned analingus. Tonguing that guy’s hole will open it up and get it pre-lubed for dick. If you’re not willing to eat ass, you have no right being a top.
  6. Avoid fingers. If you’re tonguing that boy well, there’s no need to use your digits to loosen him up. Jagged edges on your fingers can cause small tears in the ass, increasing the risk of pain and STI transmission. If you do use them, make sure they’re smooth.
  7. Eye to eye. Unless you’re certain the bottom can handle anything you give him, ensure eye contact can be made while you are first entering him, usually face to face. This way you can sense whether you’re going in too fast or not. Plus, eye contact intensifies the experience when you first enter someone.
  8. Taking the plunge. First entrance is the most delicate moment in sex. You don’t want to tear the guy a new asshole before you’ve even got to fucking. Ease it in slowly, feeling his hole expand around your shaft – if you need to push hard against his hole, you’re plunging in too fast.
  9. Don’t cancel. Bottoms take a lot of time and effort getting their asses prepared and tidy for you. Don’t be a jerk and cancel at the last minute or just not show up. That should apply in all situations but it’s even worse when you do it to a conscientious bottom.
  10. Bottom. That’s right – even if you consider yourself an exclusive top, it’s important to bottom every so often. This reminds you of all the effort that bottoms put in for you and gives you perspective. So bend over and take it like a man.

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One thought on “Treat your bottoms like princesses. 10 things you must do to become a better top.

  1. Russell

    In an article which appeared Sept. 25, 2013 entitled “10 Things You Need to Know About Being a Gay Bottom” Brian stated that being a bottom is ” …like being gay. It’s not a choice. It’s just the way you are. You were born that way. He goes on to state “…Unfortunately, it seems that 9 out of every 10 gay men are bottoms.”

    Do you agree? If so, do you believe that for some men being a bottom is very much a choice and can actually be a learned desire independent of sexual orientation itself?

    I’m neither top nor bottom and actually find most sex stemming from homosexual desire to be a distraction at best. The only actual sex I find exciting, and then only marginally, is being passive to someone who performs orally, but only if the person’s image appeals to me and only because of fantasies most akin to mainstream gay domination and submission.
    But, if domination/submission isn’t real, it’s silly, and actual domination sex is either silly or inherently disrespectful of another person.

    The point I’m making is that nothing stated about sexual desires is always true in every case. We’re all individuals having at least the potential to be unique.

    Reply