This article was published on April 8th, 2015
Bottoms are the most precious gift given to the gay community, offering their beautiful bums to be used and filled. There are many articles advising on how to be a better bottom. But all that effort shouldn’t be one sided – topping involves a lot less preparation, but that means a good top should do what he can to ensure the bottom’s pleasure. Here are 10 things you must do to become a better top.
- Lube. It’s your responsibility to supply the lube. Silicone is more viscous and dries out less quickly but it is harder to clean up than water-based lube. You can buy little packets to carry around with you in case of unexpected encounters.
- Boner pills. If you’ve ever had trouble staying hard enough before or during anal sex, which generally requires you to be stiffer than for vaginal sex, you probably have felt embarrassed. Get a prescription for some boner pills such as Viagra or Cialis. Viagra works out to be about $5 a dose. There’s no harm in carrying an extra one in your pocket when you go out on a Saturday night; who knows where you’ll end up.
- Breathe freshener. There is no bigger turn off than having someone with bad breathe on top of you. Carry some breathe freshener around with you should you have a spontaneous moment.
- The safer sex chat. Talk about prophylaxis before you start anything, preferably before you meet up. It is not right to get a guy’s ass hungry for cock during foreplay and then tell him you don’t use condoms. These decisions should be made when both people are thinking rationally and clearly.
- Tongue that boy. Nothing gets a guy’s ass hungrier for cock than some good old fashioned analingus. Tonguing that guy’s hole will open it up and get it pre-lubed for dick. If you’re not willing to eat ass, you have no right being a top.
- Avoid fingers. If you’re tonguing that boy well, there’s no need to use your digits to loosen him up. Jagged edges on your fingers can cause small tears in the ass, increasing the risk of pain and STI transmission. If you do use them, make sure they’re smooth.
- Eye to eye. Unless you’re certain the bottom can handle anything you give him, ensure eye contact can be made while you are first entering him, usually face to face. This way you can sense whether you’re going in too fast or not. Plus, eye contact intensifies the experience when you first enter someone.
- Taking the plunge. First entrance is the most delicate moment in sex. You don’t want to tear the guy a new asshole before you’ve even got to fucking. Ease it in slowly, feeling his hole expand around your shaft – if you need to push hard against his hole, you’re plunging in too fast.
- Don’t cancel. Bottoms take a lot of time and effort getting their asses prepared and tidy for you. Don’t be a jerk and cancel at the last minute or just not show up. That should apply in all situations but it’s even worse when you do it to a conscientious bottom.
- Bottom. That’s right – even if you consider yourself an exclusive top, it’s important to bottom every so often. This reminds you of all the effort that bottoms put in for you and gives you perspective. So bend over and take it like a man.
Also check out:
- 6 steps to being the best top on the block
- Top 5 Mistakes Gay Men Make in Bed
- 10 Things You Need to Know About Being a Gay Bottom