This article was published on February 22nd, 2017
Has anyone ever said to you: “Girl, you need to get your pubic hair under control!”? With the advent of the metrosexual man, there has been a sudden resurgence in making sure your bush is beat back. Here’s everything the modern gay man needs to know about manscaping their body hair in 2017:
Some men shave their balls, some men wax, and some men clipper their bushes like Edward Scissorhands in a snowstorm.
Gay men prefer the bald eagle look. If you are going to shave your ‘stache and sack, be sure to do it smartly. The ball sack has some of the thinnest skin on the entire body, and scraping a sharp piece of metal along your scrotum is risky business if you don’t moisturize beforehand, use plenty of shaving cream, and an ever-steady hand. Try to stretch the skin of your nuts into a flat playing field to avoid nicks and cuts. If you do get an abrasion, it IS recommended to use some type of alcohol or after shave on the affected area, even if it does burn/hurt like a son of a bitch.
Waxing is a precarious route to take, but is often very effective. It’s the nuclear bomb of unwanted pubic hair removal: typically taking out any sign there was any hair in the area in the first place. But if you think getting a cut during shaving is painful, imagine plucking out each of your pubic hairs one by one with tweezers…but if that happened all at once. OUCH.
Clippering our playing field is the least risky type of manscapage if you play your cards right. Get both an electric and battery operated clippers with different heads and settings. The higher the setting guarantees less of a chance of nicking yourself while clippering. While the Sphynx hairless cat look is out of the question with clippers, they do enable you to keep it trim and tidy between your legs without looking like a 70s-porn actor.
Chemicals like Nair can wipe away all remnants of hair, but it is the least recommended of all the methods of pubic hair removal. What exactly is that shit? Should we be putting a chemical that erodes the structure of cells directly onto our most prized area of our bodies?
Let’s face it: Some guys like hair and others don’t. Some guys like a bald pussy.
Some guys like lumberjack, hairy-bear realness. Some still sport the Rafiki—having failed to cut down the trees in their jungle since Simba was a cub. Others are smoother than Mount Baldy on a clear day. Whatever way you decide to keep it fresh and trimmed down there, with manscaping, you always have several options.