Spring-cleaning: getting the skeletons out of your closet

Time to clear the crap out of your wardrobe.

Arts Fabulous Fashion Brian Webb

This article was published on March 18th, 2017

Babes—spring-cleaning isn’t just a metaphor. It is a real-life push to get you to rid the skeletons out of your closet! No one needs a bunch of possessions that never get worn hanging around in the wardrobe. It’s time to grab life by the moth balls and commit to some serious spring cleaning. This primavera, it’s out with the old to make room for the new: time to clean out that closet. This is spring-cleaning: Time to get the skeletons out of your closet.

Start with the basics: admitting you have a problem is half the battle. One of the best ways to begin spring cleaning is by sorting and organizing. Group your possessions into sections like “most used” or “new with tags.” Organizing can help you establish an outline for what you want to accomplish and how exactly you’re going to get there.

Next, go for the jugular. If it doesn’t fit today, throw it away. Spring cleaning means coming out of that closet with less than what you started with, and beginning with those pieces that you can’t even wear in the present seems like a great place to dive into. No more dream weight or out grown weight baggage.

It’s ok to love some distress, drama, and holes in your life, just like in your clothes clothes. And though it can be fashionable to have the latest GStar Raw jeans that have been hacked up worse than a shrub, evaluate if some nice skinny jeans or well fitted pants might make the new you seem more like an adult version. Faded into glory? Cut up beyond belief? Homeless chic is on its way out with the rest of the spring cleaning.

This might be hard for some of you queens who hold onto things for dear life like memories, but if anything in your arsenal is more than two years old, it’s time to throw it away or put it in the donation pile. The only except to this rule is if it is a classic piece like a smart, well-tailored navy suit, otherwise, it has to go. Change is inevitable and removing some of your “staples” gives you room to grow.

Time sensitive pieces are your next pray. Any outfit that has been over-photographed with you wearing it, for example, you’ve worn it at two or more circuit parties, event premiers, or Pride parades, then it must go. No need to keep that birthday gifted tie your ex’s in-laws gave you. Your old choir sweatshirt from high school brings up bad memories anyways. And that old jacket you just can’t part with? Severe your relationship with a piece of fabric and let it go, Elsa. Let it go!

Spring-cleaning is never easy. Letting go is hard. And change doesn’t come quickly. A lot more metaphors can be used to not entirely describe the total pain in the ass ordeal that is spring cleaning. How and why does anyone actually decide they need to throw a bunch of shit away is up to them. Maybe this article will help you embrace your inner tidy self. Maybe you can’t bear to lose anything, you hoarder, you. If you are struggling, then start small by getting rid of old toiletries by tossing the ones you don’t use out, like you did with your cheating ex.

The point of starting the spring-cleaning crusade in the first place is a desire to feel like possessions don’t make the person. Once you take the initiative to begin dissecting your life and ridding yourself of excess crap, the better you’re going to feel. Spring cleaning commences now!

Spring-cleaning: getting the skeletons out of your closet

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