Versatile gays: the good, the bad, and the ugly

What's up (and down) with versatility.

Love + Sex Relationship Advice Koelen Andrews

This article was published on September 27th, 2017

You might assume versatile gays have it all, walking amongst the rest of gays with the ability to have the pick of the litter. Are versatile gay men the bisexuals of the gay dating diatribe? Are vers guys the ambiguous ones that everyone secretly assumes actually prefer one position or another? What is it about guys love both bottoming and topping that sets them apart from the rest of queer guys? And is versatility in relationships a reality or inevitability? Here’s the good, the bad, and the ugly about dating as a versatile gay man.

Being a gay man has its perks, and being a versatile gay man has benefits not all queens can reap. Versatile gays can enjoy man on man sex in any capacity with the ability to orgasm through either being dominant or submissive. Most vers gay men really truly prefer both active and passive sex, so sex and hooking up is rarely an issue: they’re ready for either/or. For this reason, versatile gay men are probably twice as likely to hookup as their counterparts.

One bad part of being versatile is the reality that you will want to engage in both topping and bottoming all the time and versatile guys aren’t always the ones available. Gay men are usually either a top or a bottom, choosing to prefer being active or passive. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this, but it can cause problems down the road when wanting to date a vers guy long term. Eventually, the v-guy is going to want one or the other. And probably both at the same time.

Is versatility inevitable in long-term relationships? Maybe. Imagine having the same sex with the same person for the rest of our gay lives. Being at least a little versatile guarantees you’re at least able to shake it up from time to time. Versatility does mean you get to have twice the fun as your strictly dickly or top-only friends. While one or the other is fun, men have their g-spot in their ass while having the pleasure of orgasming out of our penises. It is two different instruments of which to obtain a mind-blowing orgasm. Should gays deny their bodies of pleasure at either end?

The good bad and the ugly with being versatile is the knowledge that you can have it all, but getting obtaining and keeping it all might prove to be more complicated than if there was a significant preference one way or another. Gay vers guys are the only ones of us humans who can enjoy sex as the penetrator and penetratee, and that difference, no matter how you look at it or which you prefer, should be something to celebrate. Even 50/50. Look at it this way: of you’re a versatile gay man struggling to find someone or date sometime, just remember that you’re a cut above the rest. And the flip fucker of your dreams is somewhere around the corner.

Versatile gays have it all! The flip fucker of your dreams is out there somewhere. Get the good, the bad, and the ugly about dating a versatile gay man.

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