Beach Bummer – summer skin issues for your bottom

We’re deep in summer. It’s hot and humid, which means you better be ready to sweat — either lying on the beach and between the sheets. For sure we get […]

Health Grooming Dr. Evan Goldstein

This article was published on August 4th, 2018

We’re deep in summer. It’s hot and humid, which means you better be ready to sweat — either lying on the beach and between the sheets. For sure we get it – sweaty sex can be hot! But does this kind of weather mean you should be aware of different summertime skin concerns? Absolutely. Dewy skin may be highly sought after, but swamp ass can end up being a real pain in the ass.

Get wet and have fun in Puerto Vallarta aboard Wet and Wild Cruises PV


Whether in the pool, hot tub, or at the beach, prolonged moisture in the anal region can create unwanted irritation. It is commonplace for most to lie around in a wet bathing suit on summer days, but do make sure it is a quick dry fabric or change to a fresh, dry one periodically. If a shower is nearby, rinse off the chlorine or salt, paying particular attention to those hard to reach areas (where the sun don’t shine). And, lastly, sometimes the actual fabric of the suits can cause some local irritation, so not all garments are created equal. There is a difference in fabric quality between, let’s say, Target to HomoCulture Gear. Our favorite swimsuit? Nothing. But we understand that sometimes “in the buck” is not always appropriate.

Gym time 

Similar story to the swimwear: moisture in the region, along with the friction you create during intense exercises, can create significant consequences.Invest in appropriately aerated gym wear—you will thank me for it. And I get that people don’t want to be that guy using a hair dryer, drying their ass in the communal locker rooms, but just tell them Dr. Goldstein told you to do it. A dry hole is imperative to great hygiene year round, especially during the summer months. And a clean, new, fresh pair of sexy underwear is always a must.


Speaking of underwear, get into the routine of throwing away old underwear once a year and starting fresh. What a better time to enact this “Bespoke ritual” than summertime? And no, I know what you are thinking—your underwear with holes in them are not suitable aeration to minimize any bad sequelae. Throw them the fuck away. Sexy new underwear will make you feel that much better and enhance the experience for everyone.

Upping your underwear game with Tani USA

Wet wipe saga continues 

Everyone loves a clean hole and baby wipes seem to do the trick, right? Wrong! Baby or sanitary wipes are terrible for our holes. They cause local irritation, anal cracking and fissures, along with bacterial contamination in the region—leading to infections. The best prevention is to avoid them and switch to a bidet for the best cleansing post-poo. It’s also safer for the environment. Wipes tend to increase these rash-like issues due to the moisture being trapped between your cheeks. And if your ass is that dirty that you need to use wipes, hop in the shower instead. It’s much more effective and prevents potentially catastrophic issues.

Why doesn’t everyone shower at night? You should. 

Think about it: moisture in the nether regions leads to anal irritation. Especially in NYC, where Bespoke Surgical is based, on these ridiculously hot and humid summer days. The amount of sweat, feces, and bacteria that builds up in the region where the sun don’t shine is not appealing. And, clearly, we have rituals for taking care of our exposed areas, like our face and arms. But what happened to the ass? I advise a night time routine of showering with an exfoliating bar of soap (and don’t be so timid!). Get rid of all those dingle berries and really go to town. Once you’ve dried off with a towel, use your hair blower on cool to get the anal region and your taint as dry as possible. Since we increase production of sweat and moisture during hot months, no moisturizer is necessary on a daily application. Lastly, sleep naked or with limited, airy garments, and also make sure your sheets and blankets are minimal as well.


Hair in the anal region can be both protective and a culprit. The hard part is to determine what’s best for you. Trimming, totally clean shaven, and/or lasered are all options to assist. But they each have their fair share of issues. The science of grooming ain’t easy, boys. If you trim and shave, please make sure you take the time to properly disinfect the tools you’re using. Have you ever lasered your asshole? It fucking hurts. So if one thinks their ass is beyond hairy, and potentially the culprit to continued anal issues, there are options. Do your research on all the ramifications.

Grooming in the shower


If you have tried all of the above and still have localized issues, you could add over the counter anti-fungal sprays or powder to the mix and see if it gives some relief. If there’s no improvement, then visit your doctor for a full history and evaluation, with swabbing for both bacterial and fungal, along with complete visualization, is imperative. Nip it in the bud quickly, as no one wants—especially when the boys of summer are out and about in next to nothing—to limit any anal play due to irritation that could have been prevented. Fucking with swamp ass is not appetizing and it hurts like a motha’—especially when you put certain types of lubes on that raw hole. Ouch.

Beach Bummer – summer skin issues for your bottom

This information should give you some food for thought on the proper ways to take care of your prized possession. It’s not too late to take some corrective actions to the betterment of not only your ass, but also the community that engages with it as well.

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