This article was published on August 21st, 2019
Men, by biological nature, are designed to have sex and procreate. Gay men are also pre-wired for sex, and there is nothing wrong with engaging in some carnal sexual behavior with consenting partners. There is a difference in between having a healthy sex life and actually being a sex addict. Here are some signs to look out for in case you’re wondering if you’ve become addicted to sex.
1. You masturbate multiple times per day.
Getting off on the daily is not a big deal. Everyone has sexual needs and desires. But when self pleasure is taking up several hours and multiple visits with Rosey Palm, it might be time to take a break and realize you could be addicted to self sex.
2. You can only get off with porn playing.
Often intrinsically attached to masturbating, many gay men report being addicted to porn in correlation to having an addiction to sex. While pornography can be a great sexual stimulant and aid, prolonged pornography watching can lead to a dependence and may lead to issues performing without porn.
3. You engage in reckless sex.
There is a thrill in random hookups and unprotected, anonymous sex, but these behaviors need to come with warning labels, as they put your body and health at risk for unwanted illnesses and consequences. This carelessness in an attempt to fulfill a sexual thrill is often indicative of someone with an overly saturated sexual addiction.
4. You require some kind of stimulant to help you get off.
Whether it be porn, poppers, threesomes, alcohol, GHB, marijuana, or other “mood levelers”, if you are requiring an additional aid to help cum/ orgasm during sex, you are most likely addicted to sex. This is a specific detachment from the emotional connection to sex that these drugs are allowing you to participate without completely committing to the raw emotion in the moment.
5. Sex has become a main priority.
If sex and hooking up is taking weight over connections and friendships, then you are most definitely addicted to sex. Sex should be an additional human experience that we get to share with someone and shouldn’t be your life’s daily mission multiple times a day.
6. You feel embarrassed and closed off from friends and family due to your sexual activities and interests.
Everyone has fetishes and kinks. But if your sex has turned into dark obsessions you feel ashamed to tell anyone about—to the point that you are shutting people out of your life—it’s time to get help for sexual addiction. You shouldn’t be excluding anyone to keep your secret sex life sustained.
7. You are leading two completely different lives.
Sex should be something you can confide in about to your best friends and should never have to be something you feel you cannot discuss with fellow adults. If you have to lead a double life to protect your super secret sexual alter ego, it might be time to consider the possibility that you are a sex addict.
If you think you are addicted to sex, there are several paths you can take to combat and deal with this addiction. Some can stop cold turkey or “check themselves” by drastically and dramatically decreasing their sexual activities. Others attend support groups for addicts. Many people require counseling to help them further understand their addictions. While others are still combating their addictions today.
Just know that there is no right or wrong answer when it comes to the ways you choose to treat your sex addiction. There are tools and resources available to help you and sexual addicts like yourself.