What Every Top Needs To Know About Bottoms

Breaking down the basics of how bottoms function to the more nuanced aspects of their psychology.

Love + Sex Sex Education Brian Webb

This article was published on March 1st, 2022

If you’re a top who’s been lucky enough to find a bottoming partner, congratulations! You’re about to embark on a journey that, when done correctly, can be incredibly rewarding for both of you. However, there are some things every top needs to know about bottoms to make the experience as enjoyable as possible for everyone involved.

Bottoms often have specific requests and desires when it comes to sex, and it’s up to the top to make sure that everyone is enjoying themselves. It can be tough to figure out what makes a bottom feel good, but don’t worry – HomoCulture has you covered. This guide will help you out in understanding the wants and needs of the bottom.

The different types of bottoms

There are a few different types of bottoms, and tops need to be aware of them. The first type is the versatile bottom. Versatile bottoms can do it all: take turns being the top and bottom, go both ways. They’re the most common type and are good for those who want to explore their options. 

The second type is the total bottom. Total bottoms like to be dominated and controlled. They’re usually submissive and enjoy letting the top take charge. 

The last of these is the power bottom. They like to be in control and are usually pretty domineering and enjoy being in charge during sex. Knowing what kind of bottom you are dealing with will help you understand their needs and how to please them sexually. 

What do bottoms want?

Bottoms want a partner who is communicative, considerate, and takes care of their needs. They want someone who makes them feel comfortable and safe and isn’t afraid to ask what they want in bed. 

Bottoms also want their partners to be creative, open-minded, and up for trying new things. Basically, bottoms want their partners to be the best version of themselves – and they’re worth taking the time to please.

How to know if a bottom is into you

As a top, you should know how to read a bottom, and there are a few ways to do it. If a bottom is not into you, it can be very painful and embarrassing for both of you. There are some key things to look for to help you determine if a bottom is interested in you. 

First, pay attention to body language. Is the bottom making eye contact with you? Is he smiling and relaxed, or is he tense and avoiding eye contact? Also, listen to what the bottom is saying. Is he asking about your sexual preferences? Is he talking about what he likes in bed?

If the answer is yes to any of these questions, then it’s likely that the bottom is interested in you. If the answer is no, then it may be best to move on.

How to please a bottom

A lot has been said about tops and their needs, but what about the other half of the equation? As a bottom, ensure you know what pleases your partner and makes them feel good. Different strokes for different folks, as they say! 

Here are a few things to keep in mind: 

  • Be vocal: let your partner know what you like and don’t like. Communication is key! 
  • Pay attention to their body language. If they pull away or seem uncomfortable, it might be time to stop. 
  • Don’t be afraid to get playful: experiment with new positions and techniques.
  • Make sure they’re enjoying themselves: the goal is mutual pleasure!

The top’s guide to giving mind-blowing anal play


Trust is key when it comes to rimming. You need to be comfortable with each other and have a clear understanding of what’s going on. If you’re the top, start by rimming your partner gently, using your tongue to lick and tease their ass. If they enjoy it, you can gradually increase the intensity.

Be sure to listen to your partner’s feedback and pay attention to their body language — if they pull away or seem uncomfortable, back off. Rimming is all about giving and receiving pleasure, so make sure you’re both enjoying it.

Anal fingering

When fingering a bottom, you’ll need to be gentle and use plenty of lube.Some tops like to use their fingers to stimulate the prostate or the “Male G-Spot.”. It’s a sensitive spot, so start slowly and experiment to find what feels good.

Mind your etiquette, tops!

As a top, there are some things you should keep in mind when interacting with bottoms. First and foremost, respect their boundaries and never do anything without consent. Different people like different things, so don’t be judgmental if a bottom isn’t into something you are. 

Be communicative and forthcoming with what you want, and always let the bottom know when you’re about to cum. Finally, be generous and gracious — remember that bottoms put themselves at risk for your pleasure, so show your appreciation!

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One thought on “What Every Top Needs To Know About Bottoms

  1. Bill

    A few more things that us bottoms will appreciate that will make things even better, as we want to ensure that our top is enjoying himself as much as possible:

    Fingering: make sure that you trim AND file your nails so that they aren’t too long or have sharp or jagged edges. The insides are far more prone to tearing and damage than the skin on the body. But, once you get your finger(s) inside us… whoa. Let’s go! 🙂

    Communication (auditory): audible communication isn’t just words. Communication can include sounds like appreciative moans or gasps when you’re enjoying what we’re doing to you (like giving head) and a good series of grunts when you cum. Your sounds can be such a turn on for us. It lets us know that you’re enjoying our body, especially when you’re cumming. Seriously. A good grunt while you cum is one of the hottest things ever!

    Communication (physical): some gentle guiding of our hand or head towards a certain part of your body is also a good way to tell us what you enjoy. Just don’t start pushing forcefully, unless you already know that your bottom is into that. Also, if you’re enjoying the blowjob that we’re giving you, your hands on our head can be exceptionally hot!