This article was published on April 19th, 2023
In a sketch show in 2015, Australian comedian Jim Jefferies suggested that April 18 should be dedicated to National Anal Sex Day. When it comes to gay, bisexual, and men-who-sleep-with-men (MSM), National Anal Sex Day is more than just a day or recognition—it’s a day of celebration! Here is our fundamental guide to anal sex to help you have an incredible National Anal Sex Day!
Top, Bottom, and Vers
Knowing what role you are going to play will determine the amount of prep work that happens before having anal sex. The top is the person who is penetrating, the bottom is the person who is being penetrated, and versatile (vers) may either penetrate, be penetrated, or both.
Every bottom has their preferred method of preparing to have anal sex. Some prefer douching with an enema, others prefer using a hose connected to the faucet in the shower. Whatever method you prefer, it is important to clean inside and out of the rectum. It’s not recommended to use soap inside the anal cavity because it can cause irritations to the mucus membrane, leading to tears. Douche until the water runs clear.
Grooming and hygiene
Most guys have a regular manscaping routine. This includes trimming, shaving, and even waxing body hair. Because of the risk of nicks, cuts, and tears, which can expose you to infections and diseases, it is recommended to manscape the day before, and not immediately before. It’s equally as important to brush your teeth and use mouth wash at least an hour before, and to put on deodorant. Cute, clean underwear is also recommended. Some men prefer the natural scent of men, furry bodies, or sweaty underwear, so it’s not always necessary to follow this step exactly, but fresh breath is an important rule-of-thumb to follow.
Safer sex toolkit
Protecting yourself and your partner is important. While there are risks with having anal sex, it is possible to reduce your risk of getting or transmitting HIV or sexually transmitted illnesses. From taking PrEP or TasP, getting tested, and communicating, there are a host of tools you can use in your personal safer sex toolkit that will allow you to have fun while staying safer.
Anal sex can be painful, especially if the bottom isn’t prepared. Anal sex shouldn’t hurt. The anal sphincter needs to be relaxed. Some methods to relax include being in a calm environment, listening to music, using aromatherapy, kissing and foreplay, and breathing techniques.
Water-based, silicone, and hybrid are the most common types of personal lubricants. Water based lubricants are easy to clean and do not stain, but often need to be reapplied, especially in longer sessions, which can result in the lubricant becoming sticky as it dries out. Silicone lubricants last much longer and are not as sticky but will often stain sheets and clothing. Avoid using oil-based lubricants with condoms because it will cause them to break.
While gay, bisexual, queer, trans, and MSM all typically enjoy having anal sex, some do not; they prefer sexual encounters that exclude anal sex—this is called being a ‘side’. In addition, many heterosexual people experiment and enjoy anal sex.
Now that you have the fundamental guide to having anal sex, you can celebrate National Anal Sex Day with your partner(s).
Do you have tips that you for having anal sex? Leave your advice in the comments section below.