This article was published on November 22nd, 2014

It’s one thing if your best friend or roommate walks in on you while you’re hooking up with another guy, but if you live at home and your mom walks in, that’s a whole different situation. See, mom’s and gay sons have a special bond. It’s very pure, caring and open. But no mother could ever be prepared to walk into her son’s bedroom and find him having sex with another guy.

If you’re been in this situation, you know exactly how awkward that moment is. You hear the door open, look up, and your mom is standing there in shock, not sure if she should slam the door shut or if she should continue to walk like nothing was happening. Your mind quickly races back to the night before when you said it would be find for him to sleep over, and the thought that you had that there was a chance you could get caught, but you never thought it would actually happen. Guess what. It did. Now, your biggest fear just came true.

But what would you do if you were in that situation? If it’s never happened to you before, here are some helpful suggestions of things to do when your mother walks in on you while having sex.

1. Ask her if she would like to take a picture. If this is the first time that she’s ever walked in on you and she’s paralyzed with fear, a photograph of the historic moment would be perfectly acceptable. It’s an image that’s already going to be engrained in her head for life anyway.
2. Pretend like nothing is going on. Just be cool, calm, and act natural. It’s just sex. Everyone does it. So it happens to be two guys and it’s shocked the hell out of your mother because she’s never seen gay sex before. The more you make it a non-issue, the easier it’ll be for everyone.
3. Quietly ask the guy to get off your cock. The last thing you want to do is to continue fucking, especially if your mom has never seen gay sex before or know who the guy is that you’re in bed with.
4. Cover-up. While it was ok for your mom to see you naked when you were a baby, you’re a grown man now and your mom certainly doesn’t need to see your junk flapping around in the wind, and your body parts entangled with another guy.
5. Explain he’s having a cardiac arrest, call 9-1-1. Depending on the position you are in, you might be able to get away with this. It would be perfectly natural that you’re both in bed, completely naked, one on top of the other. Hopefully he plays along quickly and says, “It’s ok. I’ll be fine. No need to call the paramedics.”
6. Hide the used condom on the floor, quick! Perhaps she didn’t notice that you were having sex, and maybe she thought you were wrestling, which boys do, until she glances down to see a used condom laying beside the bed. Discretely slide your leg out of the bed to hid the condom under the bed or a pile of clothes. If you’re really talented you could clench it with your toes and slide your foot back into the bed for more secure hiding spot, especially if she’s coming in to pick up your dirty laundry.

Whatever option you choose you’ll still need to help the guy get out of the house and face your mother later in the day. Just go about your normal daily business. If it comes up, you can always say that you guys were out late and your friend needed a place to crash. Don’t make a big deal about it. Next time, go hook up a his house.